Thursday, March 31, 2011

IGNORANCE BLISS? No Way Hosea!

IGNORANCE.  What a pain in the behind!

I have been having such trouble with spacing on my blog.  The computer seemingly has had a mind of it's own.  Irregardless of how I wrote the article, the computer would print it as one big paragraph.

My son Mark drove up from Mansfield, 65 miles, to take me out to lunch for my birthday.  We went to Bob Evans.  We both had soup and salad.  There was breaded mushrooms with dip for appetizer and banana bread and fresh fruit for dessert.  What a treat!

When he brought me home, Mark came up to have a two minute talk with my computer.  The problem was garbage in garbage out.  Mark explained what I wanted to the computer and. lo a behold, all is well again.

IGNORANCE!

I also had him take a look at my new Polaris FS1 Heart Monitor.  He had it set up to automatically pick  up my heart rate after a few seconds on that setting.  It hasn't been doing that.  It wouldn't do it for him either and he couldn't figure out why, said it wasn't getting a signal.  At that comment I rewet the chest piece to allow the transmitter to pick up my heart beat.  Mark laughed!  He said "Dad, you're wetting the battery, not the contacts, showing me where the contacts are.  When I wet the contacts the instrument worked perfectly.

IGNORANCE!

And, I've been ignorant of the heart rate monitor for a long time.  I've been wetting the battery and not the contacts since I've had my recumbent trike.  It has always worked.  Why.  My sweat provided moisture for the contacts. 

Oh, Well!

Thank the good Lord for educated children!  Speaking of educated children, excepting Mark, they are scattered across the country.  Todd is in Virginia on a cross country bike ride during the Easter school break, (his wife Amy is a teacher).  Kimberly, as seen here sailing in Naples, Florida with her family.  They were heading for an air conditioned mall, when she called, as it was 88 degrees and bright sunshine.

Regardless of where they were, or how much fun they may have been having, they made time to call and wish their Dad a happy 80th birthday.  I sure appreciate my kids.

At lunch I shared the photo album on our last year's month at the beach.  Mark was as impressed with cousin Cheryl's gift as was I.   

God Bless        

Wednesday, March 30, 2011

PNEUMONOULTRAMICROSCOPICSILICOVOLCANOCONIOSIS: Huh?


Move over electrophotomicrographically! You may have been the longest word in the book but there is a new "kid" in town.

PNEUMONOULTRAMICROSCOPICSILICOVOLCANOCONIOSIS.

Do you recognize this 45 letter word? Is it a word you use frequently? Well, you might you know. The word has been around awhile.

In a 1965 episode of I've Got a Secret, Buddy Hackett unrolls a banner with the word on it.

In Grandpa vs Sexual Inadequacy, Abraham Simpson asks Homer whether pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis is whats wrong with Marge.

What does it mean? It is a factitious, (what ever that is), word alleged to mean "a lung disease caused by inhalation of very fine silica dust, causing inflammation in the lungs".

Un Huh!

I've mentioned my 80th birthday, which is tomorrow, in two recent blogs. Can I get by with doing it again? Why not? It's my blog, right?

Julie told me this morning that there would be packages coming today and tomorrow. They are my birthday presents and I am not to open them. I really got a chuckle when I brought in the first package today. Gee, I wonder what's in this box?

There was another package for Julie and I have no idea what is in it but it sure looks interesting. It is from my cousin, Cheryl, and I don't think it is for me. BUT HOPE SPRINGS ETERNAL!

I got some cards in the mail today also. I love those comic cards. Check out this one from my youngest son and wife, Todd & Amy. I ride a recumbent trike and Todd and Amy ride recumbent bikes. WHAT A RIOT!
I have been pretty much house bound this winter. But I am never alone. Right behind my chair is my constant companion. Where I am, there he is also. Gunner watches out for his master.

LET THE GOOD TIMES ROLL!


Take care and God Bless!

Monday, March 28, 2011

80TH BIRTHDAY: Coming Fast!

Born on March 31, 1931 in Point Pleasant, WV, my 80th birthday is coming fast! Three more days, if the Lord's willing and the krick don't get too high! As I blogged earlier, the family is planning a party for me on April 9th, the first date all could get together.

I am not aware of any family that has more fun than does mine. And, there is a bunch of us. I do know one thing, there will not be a cross word or a moment of discord with these great folks. I AM SO PROUD OF EACH ONE OF THEM!

Not everyone will be at the party, sad to say. One relative that who will be absent will be my cousin Cheryl Buckley and her husband Jack. Cheryl and I met via this blog site a couple years ago. Julie and I visited them in their home, near Charlottesville, VA, Thanksgiving 2009 and they visited us at our Myrtle Beach condo in October 2010. We have planned a dinner in Charleston, WV over the upcoming Memorial Day. Jack and Cheryl Buckley are the kind of people you are glad to be associated with, CLEAN ENUFF TO BE HEALTHY AND DIRTY ENUFF TO BE HAPPY! My kind of people. Yesterday I received my first birthday present from Cheryl and Jack. WHAT AN ABSOLUTE TREASURE! It will get passed along to oncoming generations. It was a beautifully, cloth bound Photo Album of the Myrtle Beach vacation with they and my son and daughter-in-law, Mark and Mary Kay. I must find out how Cheryl did this work of art! Certainly professional, a group picture shows through the front cover. Each large page contains a picture or so of the trip. The pages around the lovely colored pictures are themselves a work-of-art. Then, each photo has a discriptive title, like the picture of she and Jack at the bridge at Broadway at the Beach. It read JOINED AT THE HIP. Thank you, Cheryl and Jack, for my first birthday present! LOOK AT THE BEAUTIFUL SCRIPT ON THIS CARD. May your hand be so steady at age 80. Heck, I couldn't write like that at age 16! I KNEW THE CARD WAS FROM MY FRIEND, MAUDE, WHEN I TOOK IT OUT OF THE MAILBOX. It was my first birthday card. It was from Maude (Blankinship) Norris, a high school classmate of the class of 1948

Maude lives in Simi Valley, Ca. I so wanted to share her 80th birthday last year but could not due to a physical ailment. I have constantly tried, since, to work out a trip to California to visit Maude. It is on my high priority list. Keep your dancing shoes handy, Maude, I'm-a-coming eventually. Meanwhile, THANKS SO MUCH FOR REMEMBERING!

God Bless!

Saturday, March 26, 2011

TODAY'S BEST INVESTMENT: It Ain't Gold!

Contrary to what you will see on the TV ads, today's best investment is not gold. Not by a long sight, in my opinion. WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO BUY SOMETHING AT IT'S ALL TIME HIGH PRICE? If any money is being made on gold, besides the commissions on those selling gold, it is probably by those "nice" people who would like to buy your mother's wedding band. They will pay you "top" price. Why? Why else? They like you! They like you!

SURE!

I am going to make a modest investment today that will give me a 100% return on my investment this year. I'll share my tip.

I bake pies. It is one of my few skills that brings great joy to me. Truly, it is better to give than to receive and I love giving folks one of my home made pies.

I recently baked a cherry pie, then drove 65 miles to my eldest son's home to give it to him. Even though he is making a major effort, and is having a lot of success, to lose weight, his blue eyes glistened when he saw the pie. It is his favorite. I was instantly repaid for my effort. He later told me that he ate one piece of pie a day for a week and was sad when he finished it.

I use two cans of water packed, sour cherries for each pie. Receipts only call for one can but I like the pies to be full of cherries and use two cans. My good wife, Julie, and I carefully check the many sheets of advertisement that comes in the mail each week. I missed the adv on cherries in the local Acme Store. Julie called it to my attention

Normally, I pay from $4 to $6 for a can of cherries. Acme has them on sale this week at two cans for $4. That's $2 a can, my friends. I know that I'll bake a cherry pie each month or so. As soon as I can I'm heading for Acme to pick up three cases, 36 cans. Costs? $72. Truly buying something I know I'll use, I will save a minimum of $72 over the next year in the costs of the cherries alone. Add to that the cost, and inconvenience, of going to the store for a couple cans of cherries every week or so, I'll get at least a 100% return on my investment.

Is that worth a blog? It is if you multiply it by every bit of food you buy. I'm not a betting man but if I were I wouldn't hesitate to wager that in the next year toilet paper prices will come close to being double today's prices. Want to make a quick $100? If I'm right, simply pick up a dozen cases of TP at Sam's club, store it away and wait.

In "How to be happy in the upcoming collapse of the Western Civilization" author Robert Ringer advised in his book that instead of trying to save money for bad times, that we buy what we will be using and store it. This is standard operating procedure for Mormons, wise people. As Ringer said in another book, DON'T JUST SIT THERE, DO SOMETHING!

In the past year I had the extreme pleasure of helping out a grand child when her husband lost his job and money was tight, a common occurrence recently for a lot of people. I spent a few dollars on fresh fruit and dairy products but otherwise I simply "rotated" my stores and took her several cases of vegetables, meats and such. Surprised at the case lots, I assured her that they had just come off the shelves at home.

Now, I know I'll hear, or it will be said when I don't hear it, IT MUST BE NICE! Which implies that I am somehow better off than those who opine, "it must be nice". NOTHING COULD BE FURTHER FROM THE TRUTH! It is true that at my age, with all the kids long gone, that I can and do live on less. Retired for 20 years now, I MAKE SO MUCH LESS! I am simply "blown away" at how much money people make today.

My ability to buy case lots is a mental attitude. I PAY MYSELF FIRST. Do you do that? Or, do you pay everyone else, people you don't even like, and pay yourself with what is left? If you paid yourself first, even at a modest one-third of minimum wage, $2.40 a day, and you watched the ads for half price cherries, or what have you, you could buy a case of cherries each month.

Vegetables, at sale prices, in low costs stores like SAVE-A-LOT or ALDIS, are around $5.88, or less, a case. At one third of an hours pay at minimum wage you could easily have the peace of mind of food on hand if the world comes to a halt--like it has in my life time. You can buy a case of Tomato or Chicken Noodle soup at Sam's for around $6 a case. If you pay yourself first, you can have the security of this great food at all times.

IT REALLY IS JUST A MATTER OF ATTITUDE! Pay yourself first.

Of course, you also have to have some "smarts". I was recently in a home of a young couple who was proudly showing off new flooring in their home. I know for a fact that these folks live from pay to pay. When I heard how many thousand they had spent on materials and labor for that flooring, I mentioned that they could buy a case of food for $5.88. I should have saved my breath. THEY HARDLY LISTENED. I know they will never do that. Not in a million years! HOW SAD!

Bye-the-bye, if you are sitting on a ton of gold during bad times, more than likely, in my opinion, the government will take it from you. THEY HAVE DONE THAT IN MY LIFETIME. Ask yourself what you would like to buy with the gold and buy it today at a great savings and at a fraction of what it would cost during periods of high inflation.

BUT THEN, WHAT DO I KNOW?

I know this: WILL ROGERS IS REPORTED TO HAVE SAID THAT HE WASN'T NEARLY AS CONCERNED ABOUT THE RETURN "ON" HIS MONEY AS HE WAS ABOUT THE RETURN "OF" HIS MONEY. I "know" I'm getting a 100% return "on" my money invested in canned tuna. With the tunna there for me to use at any time, I'm getting the return "of"my money also.

Yes, I plan an even larger garden this year.

I also cling to my Bible and my guns.

AND I HAVE A BIG, MEAN DOG. Watch'em Gunner!

NUFF SAID?


Take care and God Bless!

I cant imagine why you would want to know but the number one song in 1931, the year I was born, was "Life is just a Bowl of Cherries".

Friday, March 25, 2011

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE COIN: Fair & Balanced!

After the blog on men being less stressed, perhaps I should write a more precise blog giving the fair sex their just due. CONSIDER THESE COMPARISONS.

EATING OUT
* When the bill arrives, Mike, David & John will each throw in $20, even though it's only $32.50. None of them have anything smaller and none will actually admit they want change back.

* When the girls get their bills, out comes the calculators.

MONEY
* A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

* A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need, but it's on sale.

BATHROOMS
* A man has six items in his bathroom: tooth brush and tooth paste, shaving cream, a razor, a bar of soap and a towell.

* The average number of items in the typical woman's bathroom is 337. A man would not be able to identify more than 20 of them.

ARGUMENTS
* A woman has the last word in any argument!

*Anything a man says after that is a new argument!

FUTURE
* A successful man is one who can make more money than his wife can spend.

* A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

MARRIAGE
* A woman marries a man expecting he will change, he won't.

* A man marries a woman expecting she won't change, she will.

DRESSING UP
* A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the trash, answer the phone, read a book or to get the mail.

* A man will dress up for weddings and funerals.

NATURAL
* Men wake up as good-looking as when they went to bed.

* Women some how deteriorate during the night.

OFF SPRING
* Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about their dental appointments and romance, best friends, favorite foods, secret fears and hopes and dreams.

* A man is vaguely aware of some short people being in the house.

A closing thought? A married man should forget his mistakes. There's no use in two people remembering the same thing, huh?

AGAIN, LADIES, AIN'T-CHA GLAD I'M BACK WITH ALL THIS WISDOM?

God Bless!

MEN: Why Are They Never Distressed

WOMEN ARE SO COMPLEX WHILE MEN ARE SO SIMPLE! Could that be why men are never depressed? Consider the following.


Men are happier, as you'd expect from such simple creations?
Their last name stays the same.
The garage is all theirs.
Their wedding plans take care of themselves.
Chocolate is just another snack.
They can be president.
They can never be pregnant.
They can wear a white T-shirt to a water park.
They can wear No T-shirt to a water park.
Car mechanics tell them the truth.
The world is their urnial.
They never drive to another gas station rest room because this one is "icky".
They never have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
The men get paid more for the same work.
Wrinkles just add to character.
While a wedding dress is $500 a tux rental is only $100.
People never stare at their chest while talking to them.
Their new shoes never cut, blister or mangle their feet.
One mood all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds, flat!
A five day vacation requires just one suitcase.
They can open jars.
They get extra credit for the slightest thoughtfulness.
If someone forgets to invite them, they can still be friends.
Their underware is $8.95 for a three pack.
Three pair of shoes? More than enough!
They just never have strap problems in public.
They are unable to see a wrinkle in their clothes.
Everything on their face stays the same color.
Their hairstyle will last for years, decades even!
They only have to shave their face and neck.
They get to play with toys all their life.
One wallet, one pair of shoes and the same color for all seasons.
They can wear shorts no matter how their legs look.
They do their nails with a pocket knife.
Growing a mustache is a choice they get to make.
A man can do his Christmas shopping for 25 on December 24 in 25 minutes.
Thank you, Lord, for letting me be a simple man!
THE TRUTH NOW, LADIES, ARE'N'CHA GLAD I'M BACK?
God Bless!

Thursday, March 24, 2011

WHAT TO BLOG ABOUT? An Update on my Hip Replacement!

So, its nearing the end of March and I have my computer back on line. WHAT SHALL I BLOVIATE ABOUT?

Well, a week from today will be my 80th birthday. I do look forward to that. Not being a year older, but rather what this birthday brings. The family is giving me a party and I think they may all come. THAT WOULD BE SOMETHING!
The party will be at my daughter, Kimberly's, house. She will be away on business on my birthday. The first date everyone could get together was on Saturday, April 9th. I know arrangements have been made to sleep out-of-town guests. I also know a grandson and his wife have purchased airline tickets flying home from Boston in April.

IT IS A TRUE JOY HAVING ALL MY FAMILY TOGETHER. Weddings are a time of joy, but there is so much involved there is never enough time for conversations with everyone. Each and everyone of my extended family are all keepers--the best of the very best! WHILE I ADMIT TO BEING PREJUDICED, ITS THE TRUTH.

As I haven't blogged since shortly after a total replacement of my left hip, I should share my current progress. MOST IMPORTANT, I HAVE NO HIP PAIN! That is after struggling with pain and pain meds for the better part of a year.

The therapists felt that my mobility was far advanced to most people with this operation. If so I feel for them. I can, and do in the house, walk without a cane. It is sort of a "gimp along" walk, I'll admit. I went to the store today to get apples for a pie I baked for Julie and forgot to take a cane along. I THINK I WILL BE SOMEWHAT BACK TO NORMAL AROUND JUNE.

I work hard on my therapy, almost daily. In addition to all the stretches and lifts, I walk on a treadmill. I walk some out-of-doors but the weather has been so cold and wet! I haven't had a bad cold and want to be careful. I can tell that I am doing better, keep extending the time and speed on the treadmill, but am personally dissatisfied with my progress. My expectations were unrealistic I guess. NORMAL FOR ME YOU SAY? Un Huh!

Kimberly's father-in-law, Mr. Tom Boggs, a college football hall-of-fame quarterback, had the same operation about a year or so ago. He was playing basketball with the grand kids last weekend. I just have to have patience, not a long suite with me!

I did invest in a new heart monitor. It is a very simple Polaris FS1 wrist model. My son, Mark, set it up for me. He has been using a Polaris heart monitor for about 15 years now. From what I can tell, my heart is doing pretty good. I'm thankful for that.


I am supposed to wait three months after the operation to ride my recumbent trike. What a disappointment that was. Well, the three months will be up in three days and I'm not sure I'm ready to ride it yet. We'll see.

I also wanted the heart monitor to more closely watch my heart on the trike. My trike computer has a heart monitor but using it is involved and at the extreme end of my vision. While I want to have another go at my aborted cross-country ride, it won't happen this year. I do have some rides planned, however, if I can ever get to training again.

FROM CALIFORNIA TO VIRGINIA, AND EVERY WHERE BEYOND AND BETWEEEN, TO EVERYONE WHO HAS LET ME KNOW THAT THEY MISSED MY BLOGS, THANK YOU FOR CARING. No promises but the tech did quite a bit of upgrading this time, in addition to removing the virus. I'm hopeful! It is hard to believe but going on 1,300 people have read my profile. WOW!

Take care, smell the roses, and God Bless!